It's Day 3 of #Crowvember. Today's crow found a peanut.

new blog post: being mad at the job market https://stanwixbuster.co.uk/blog/posts/2025-11-01/

Chat, I got big feelings** about a boy, halp!

**murderous intent

@vivi awawa

@salad_bar_breath i can’t help but feel that people feel entitled to women / femme individuals. lesbians and sapphic relationships seem like an affront because it’s a relationship where a (cis) man isn’t being centered or served. i have had my boundaries pushed and violated by cis men who feel entitled to me despite knowing that i’m not attracted to them. i am not suggesting this doesn’t happen to men, but it sure does seem to happen to women/femme people very often by comparison

@salad_bar_breath i really don’t like this explanation for polyamory either. it feels to center a transactional way of thinking for relationships that makes me uncomfortable. i could be wrong, but it framing partners by their utility feels like it has two gross implications:

• the goal is for partners to fulfill my needs and if my current relationships aren’t effectively fixing me, then i need more
• partners are judged by their utility to me

i really dont like the idea of using relationships to “fix” people; it doesn’t work and it’s extremely gross to the person who is being used to fix them. some people can offer a lot of things: financial and emotional stability, excitement, etc but those things can and will change (and basing a relationship on what they offer you is selfish and horrible – when is it your turn to offer something?)

basing relationships and partners on utility also feels hierarchical to me, as if partners which offer more utility are worth more love or are more important. just because a partner can offer me housing and financial stability doesnt mean i’ll love them more than one that has no money to offer. sure it’s nice to have that stability, but what if they lose it? im not going to stop loving them

@rowan iterawrable

@rowan that's idorable

trying to type “Iterable”

itertable. iteraratable. iterarable!

@vivi not a yinglet, but

how it started: im going to make a game engine!

how its going: which implementation of hamming weight is appropriate for this bitset class

@suricrasia imagining this being said like Skinner