i often see and hear a lot of talk about community and what it means: its something like a group of individuals with a shared identity or goal that value one another. it’s often held up in an unambiguously positive light and everyone wants to belong to one. i agree – community is wonderful and vital to our survival no matter what the threat level to our existence is. unfortunately, something i think that many aren’t ready for is how messy communities are. we have friends which are closer than others. we have partners that we want to spend most of our time with. sometimes we’re just scared or uncomfortable. there is always that one or few individuals we tolerate or just dont like. some will get jealous, some will feel betrayed. moreover, i think that most individuals belong to communities that they aren’t even aware of.

i value social bonds and community more than anything else. to me, my community is everyone directly in my life, everyone who shares my ideals and values, everyone who shares my struggles, and generally anyone i feel i can positively impact. im told im optimistic to a fault and that im going to be hurt and betrayed. and theyre right – i am. but the alternative is just not acceptable to me. i would rather be hurt for my optimism than to feed the atomized doomerism that seems to be so pervasive. i am strongly of the belief that most individuals want to care for others, want to be cared for, and want to do right by others – even if they fuck up sometimes. i am betting that my faith in others will often pay off more often than it wont.

what i want to see is more faith and trust in others. im not asking anyone to be like me and open themselves up to infinite amounts of hurt and betrayal based on a vague notion that People Are Generally Good ™ – but i would like to see others reaching out to people who they think are kinda neat. or opening up and being a bit vulnerable to that friend who they’re not exactly sure where they stand with, but they wanna be closer. i wanna see just a little bit of faith that others aren’t too busy for you or out to hurt you. not always.