the word “lazy” is used to victim-blame and suspend empathy for others. it’s a thought-terminating cliche. “why do people act like this? it’s because they’re lazy. it’s their fault and they are low-value because of it”

whenever I see the word “lazy” I try to remind myself to step back from the situation, have compassion for the people being labeled, and ask myself “what is actually the problem? is this a learned behavior? is this a neurotype thing? is this a product of hidden societal forces? does it come from trauma? how can others help them?”

nobody is simply “lazy”. it is always more complicated than that

@kasdeya without even trying to be snarky and ironic about it i looked at that last line and had to actively fight off the temptation to say "'lazy' is lazy thinking"

(it's not and the underlying reason is always a desire to punish)

@kasdeya for me it’s probably a learned behaviour. There are so many things I kept being “too lazy” for, then did it once and instead of praise got a response to the effect of “see, wasn’t so hard, now keep doing that” even when usually I literally cannot, especially not without positive reinforcement, so I give up again very quickly

@kasdeya

Most people are lazy

@kasdeya it’s also extremely hard for me to give myself that positive reinforcement (hence yearning for a partner who can understand and work with me, let me fail when I need to and such) but I think I’ve somehow managed to do it with a few things (showering more than once a month for example) because I see them as part of transitioning now and having random moments of euphoria gives me the positive reinforcement needed to keep trying to be better.

@mitsunee aww! having supportive people in your life who can recognize what’s hard for you and be encouraging is so important. I hope that you can find people like that, if they aren’t there already. I’m glad that you’ve been able to feel rewarded for some things on your own, though! that sounds like a great improvement